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I woke up this morning with news that my quaddie had a snake in his room. Very few incidences in my personal life history have had the effect of waking me up so early, and so well (Well I do physically attend the morning classes at 8.15, but that isn’t an act in “full consciousness”).
I find snakes as funny creatures: they don’t mind encroaching upon your personal space: bedroom or bathroom. And the worse part is, they are not willing to pay for the accomodation.
When we signed the life insurance and medical insurance forms as a part of the admission process, little did we bother about these potential threats lurking around the corners, wriggling into our fortresses of solitude (read Quad) with consummate ease.
There are quite a few lessons one could learn living with them:
1. Learn to share (your couch, commode, and so on…)
2. Learn to sleep with the enemy. (Married folks need not take this preterm!!)
3. Learn the law of the jungle. (MR=MC?? Not sure if that applies here…)
4. Learn what Steve Jobs learnt the hard way from Bill Gates (a small crevice may be enough for the enemy to creep in!!)
5. Learn the ultimate truth, that we all must meet the same end sooner or later (I wish this realization mellows the incorrigible ISB chain mail freak. In their unflinching resolve to be club presidents, these guys display their infinite capacity to produce and consume snakeshit, and could do well to spare lesser mortals …)
So next time you see a mommy snake changing diapers for baby snake, you could do the following:
1. Keep the most quixotic mix of antivenoms and take two ml after every meal.
2. Get the entire quad sprayed with some apparently snake-repelling liquid, till the stench makes you abandon your rooms as well. (The second snake in our quad appeared moments after the spray, as if it couldn’t resist the fragrance, like ladies can’t resist AXE!!)
3. Call Housekeeping if you have the slightest of doubt (Murali usually comes to our quad well-armed with broomstick and pickers)
4. If noone picks up the phone in (2.), call 911. (for guys who refused admissions in US schools)
5. Cry foul !! (They should have been more explicit when they mentioned about the famous peacock-crossing…You weren’t exactly expecting this right?)
By the way, the housekeeping staff mentioned that the two snakes belonged to phylum ANACONDA!!
